Lorraine Tillman, 40 years old
Dating , Relationships. When I was single I went through a two year spate of dating commitment-phobes. This was my thing. I invested in several fruitless relationships with men who were avoidant, emotionally unavailable , inconsistent and generally noncommittal. This was a frustrating and really draining time in my life especially because most of the men I chose also lived interstate. Many of my clients lament their stories of getting to the second stage of dating , only to have the romantic rug pulled out from under them. It is another name for Relationship Anxiety or fear of relationships.
Commitment can be a very scary thing for many young people, two commitment phobes dating included. I am now at a stage in my life where I can be very committed, but I wasn't this way just a year or two ago. I was a young something dude with issues. I was a commitment-phobe who dated a lot of women with no intention of ever settling down. These commitment issues were not only exclusive to my love life, but also my professional life. Eventually, maturity and sorting out personal issues allowed me to get over my fear of commitment. A woman who is dating a guy with commitment issues is often left confused, wondering where she stands with him. However, if you're a woman not looking for something too serious, dating a guy with commitment issues can be exciting, as they tend to be fun and spontaneous.
Many people these days are afraid of commitment, and for many reasons. For example, people with commitment phobia go after others who also have a fear of commitment. Once the chase is over, the person who was once out of their league becomes less appealing, and especially when they desire to have a commitment.
Two commitment phobes dating
More about two commitment phobes dating:
Prove how awesome you are, and then disappear suddenly. I threw the guy I was quasi-dating for months an amazing birthday party with all his friends. It was a special night. The next weekend, I left town without any warning so he could realize just how much less fun life was without me around. By the time I got back mid week, he was thirsting for me hardcore. And that was that. Mission accomplished!
You two look at each other with loving gazes, talk to each other for hours, think about each other when you fall asleep, and know you are both in love. You had the most fun times with each other and months have passed where you finally think that you need to be taking it to the next level. But when you ask your lover, they start to hesitate, deflect from the conversation, and make excuses. Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License. Commitment phobes are the ones who love their partners, but cannot commit to anything serious. They run away from the idea of marriage or any type of serious commitment, and their escapism generally takes a toll on the relationship. If you are with a commitment phobe, you may notice disinterest or apathy whenever you bring up the future.
The chase for the Commitment Phobe is like their bread and butter. No one is better at it and you will be sure to fall for them. Their techniques include making themselves your ideal person. They will watch you like their prey, laugh at your jokes, like the movies you like, go to the gym more or lie about it to impress you , they will commit to the win. They will play it cool. In some way or another they will find you out of their league if your not they are bored and you are what they think they want until you want more. A classic sign of this is their inability to show emotions other than positive ones.